Man there is so much crap here at the end of the year. We just had our last day of chemistry though so that's awesome. Calculus we have a big multimedia project due on Friday which is the same day as my APUSH field trip. In APUSH i don't even know what we're doing. English we have an essay to write on some random book. Marine bio I need to get my grade up because I've been slacking. I have the APES exam this Wednesday and then have to come up with some presentation. We aren't doing anything in AMPS anymore now that regionals is over. Oh, Eric got accepted to MOP! :)

Why?

So I know Oscar will never see this even though I wish he cared enough to even want to, but I don't think he knows why I asked him to prom. I asked him because I wanted a night where I could feel like the girls like his girlfriend. I wanted a night where I felt pretty and wanted and felt like I could get any man I wanted and did so. That was foolish of me. I didn't feel pretty, he never said a word about the way I looked. I didn't feel wanted, he barely paid attention to me, his eyes were too glued to his phone screen. I didn't feel like I could get any man I wanted because even though I was trying everything I possibly could to please him all the way down to back rubs and neck massages, he still wanted nothing to do with me. Heck, I couldn't even turn the head of the guy who was madly in love with me since freshman year! I didn't get the man I wanted, I felt alone and abandoned. It was miserable but I tried with everything I had to make it fun because ive been convincing myself ever since he said yes that I can't kill myself now, I have prom to look forward to and I wanted prom to be worth saving my life for. Let's just say these cuts weren't here before prom.

After prom

So prom was last night... It was, well, disappointing. It was so obvious that my date was not into the dance or me but that was to be expected because he's gorgeous so I guess he can get away with it. He has a gf of a year and a half but he doesn't know if he loves her. Weird. He goes off for army training in the fall and then some sort of mission thingy in the spring but will be back at isu in the fall of 2012 when I start. He made sure I knew not to try anything because he had a gf but I would never have the guts to. But man, trust me, I wanted to. I have been like so sex deprived lately that I wouldve been more than happy to make out with him. But please, he barely ever touched me. :( It was weird having Tony my ex follow us around during after prom though. The go karts were awesome and it was kinda fun mini golfing. I loved the twister/ tornado thing where you got in and it shook you around. We rode it and went through a mine! The hypnotist was hilarious. I am very disappointed in myself for being so lame during prom though. We didn't dance much and he got pissed at me for leaving him behind, but honestly he has no right because he was on his phone 24/7 texting his gf. We had those cool new weird drink things and that was fun. We went to Jimmy johns for dinner which pretty much set the mood for the night.