Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Seriously?

I really hate feeling like this. 1. I AM NOT trying to pit you guys against each other. 2. You make me feel like shit. 3. Everytime we fight it makes me want to hurt myself even more. 4. If we keep fighting like this, I am going to hurt myself. Got it? Ok. I'm sorry for all the trouble I've caused you. Either fix things, stop complaining, or end it. That's all I can possibly say on this matter. I am sick of fighting. I don't want to leave you but right now I feel like I'd be less suicidal if we weren't together. Yes, you do keep your feelings from me, and that is what I don't want. I want you to share. I love you and it hurts me when you don't tell me when something is wrong. I am sick of being blamed for everything. I need a guy who can put up with who I am. If you aren't that guy, tell me. On a happier note, I am working on both of his surprises :D I think he'll really like them. I hope he keeps them forever. <3 I have A LOT of homework tonight. 3 AP Bio Chapters and an AP Euro chapter. I am so screwed.
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1 comment:

  1. AlcalhradMarch 30, 2010 at 5:41 PM

    1. I know you aren't trying to pit us against each other, I knew that from the beginning.
    2. I don't ever mean to hurt you. I hate it when I feel as though I have hurt you.
    3. Don't hurt yourself please!!!! PLEASE DON'T!
    4. don't do it

    I am trying to fix things, but I need your help. I am trying hard to open up more about my feelings, I know it is something I need to do for you. I am trying to share, but I don't always know how to verbalize it correctly and I am constantly afraid of hurting you. Right now I do not think I am the right guy for you, sorry. I take responsibility for what I have done. I am sorry I am a jerk sometimes. I am sorry for the way I act, I am not perfect, only human. Do your homework, we can fix this tomorrow in person. I love you with all my heart, but that doesn't mean I don't feel pain either.

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